During the course of my research for another blog article, I came across this fairly hilariously deadpan FAQ on Medieval: Total War. The game has a character attribute system for nobles and generals. This part of the FAQ discusses the mechanics behind all the traits related to alcoholism. It’s fairly hilarious:
Social Drinker (Drink 1)– +1 Command, +1 Popularity, gained after 1 point of Drink
Gets Merry (Drink 2)– +1 Popularity, upgrade after 2 points of Drink
Steady Drinker (Drink 3)– -1 Command, +1 Popularity, upgrade after 4 points of Drink
Drunken Heathen (Drink 4)– -2 Command, -1 Authority, -2% Tax Income, upgrade after 8 points of Drink
Alcoholic (Drink 5)– -3 Command, -3 Authority, -5% Tax Income, upgrade after 16 points of Drink
Paralytic (Drink 6)– -5 Command, -5 Authority, -10% Tax Income, epithet “the Drunkard”, upgrade after 32 points of Drink
Drink has Sobriety as an antitrait, and a NoGoingBack level of 5 (there is no AA in medieval times).
Drink is not available to Middle Eastern cultures the Quran is apparently just that good, and there is no “Shisha” trait).
A general gains a point of drink on adoption or lesser adoption with 8% probability, or when offered for marriage with 6% probability. On coming of age, a general gains a point of Drink with 4% probability, and if a general’s father had one or more levels of drink, he gains a point of Drink with 30% probability.
A general belonging to the France or Denmark factions also has on additional 4% probability to gain a point on coming of age. Also, when a character marries or becomes a father, they have a 5% chance to gain a point of Drink. When a general suffers an assassination attempt, they have a 20% chance to gain a point of Drink.
Drink is also self-perpetuating. At the end of any turn, if a general has a level of Drink, they can gain a point of Drink with 4% probability. At the end of any turn, if a general is in a settlement with a brothel or better and has 100% of his movement points remaining, he gains a point of Drink with 5% probability, plus an additional chance at 5% probability if that building is a pleasure palace. If he is at sea at the end of the turn, he gains a point of Drink with 3% probability. Also, at the end of the turn in any settlement, if the general has 100% of his movement points, the game takes a random percent- if that percent is greater than 90, the general has a 1% chance to gain a point in Drink, Gambling, Arse, or Girls.
In other words, do not leave your generals in town with 100% movement points.